Perspective Is

"My Life Doesn't Suck"

The phrase I seem to be hearing a lot of these days. I think it's pretty darn cool. I am glad to be surrounded by people who are so positive and grounded. Otherwise, I might do nothing but spin my wheels, wondering how to run my wheels.

Regarding the wheels I did my homework. Proper preparation is everything. I called the Ellsworth, the manufacturer of my wheels and bike and asked just what I should do. They confirmed if I didn't run the tire tubeless I'd pinch flat over and over again. Visions of flatting in the lava fields danced in my head. Unlike my road bike tire that I cram 120 psi into, I roll about 30 psi on my mountain bike. The lower pressure allows me a cushioned and forgiving ride. It also makes it easier to pinch the inner tube should I go freight training over rocks and such. It turns out the model of wheels I have are not "tubeless ready". Vision of $$$ danced through my head. I thought I was going to be told to upgrade. Instead the tech rep told me another way of converting the wheels. This method would even solve the problem of not being able to unscrew the valve stem. Drum roll please.......the inner tube trick. I wrote down the directions exactly as my teacher said. Then, I made it sound so easy to Tim. I pretended I was going to do it myself. I think Tim was impressed an took interest. I exited as quickly as possible feigning that making eggplant parm in a very healthy tasty manner is quite a job. Dishes are now done and the wheels are converted. Fingers crossed it works 

Back to the whole "My life doesn't suck" and I have a little perspective topic. Today was one of those days the made my wheels stop spinning for just a little bit. I guess working in the ICU will grant you those moments. I cared for an elderly couple. They were enjoying the cruise trip they had been dreaming of. Ok so she was 79 and he was 83, but they totally looked young. I'd guess 60's. Unfortunately, the trip was cut short when the wife became sick and needed a breathing tube. They were a really sweet couple. They were far away from home, with no support in San Diego. The husband was tearing up as he talked to me. He commented "You wait your whole life for a trip like this."

 You'd think I'd have situations like this all the time. More often than not it's fighting amongst family members. Who gets the information first? Baby mama, the girlfriend, or the wife? This man was very choked up. I felt at a loss to help him. Pretty much I needed a time out. I pulled the "Sir, have you eaten anything today?" trick. I convinced him he needed to eat. I don't think he ate at all. Upon return, he said he found the chapel. He said some prayers. I told him he said good prayers because we started weaning her from the ventilator.Then I really worried. It was true but I could eat it if things went wrong.  This made him happy and I felt much better :) 

The man told me how wonderful everybody had been to him. He was so thankful. I really hoped his prayers would be answered in the way he wanted them to be. I could tell she was his best friend. He was so scared. Stories just don't always have a happy ending in my unit. It's basically death or drama, usually drama. I was crossing my fingers, you see bad people seem to be so much more resilient. Although clinically she looked ok, I was really worried for the husbands sake. I didn't want to think of that man alone in San Diego grieving for his wife, having regrets. Can't deal, can not deal and that is referring to me. I wished the man would get hostile and blame the cruise ship or something. It's so much easier dealing with patients who throw things at me and try to kick me. Isn't there an agitated patient for me to simmer down? I would have bit my nails if it wouldn't give me MRSA or C-diff or something. Luckily (for me), the lady did well. The breathing tube was removed. The man was ecstatic. His fears of loosing her are gone, but mine aren't. I can think of 20 possible set backs. I am really hoping they don't happen. I'm crossing my fingers now. My take away  is not, don't travel when you are 80. Rather make sure by the time you are 80 you have lived your dreams. It's much easier on your health care provider :) 

Well, it's past my bedtime. Tomorrow there is  race. Actually two. I'm racing in one. That will be easy. See I have pre-exisiting excuses. Today, I let a nursing student give me my flu shot. It's the perfect excuse. Now you all understand why I swam so slow. I am also totally unprepared. It's obvious my heart isn't in it....I don't have a Halloween costume and it's the costume race. Tim says I am wasting my ture potential. It could be my race. He could be right but I lack confidence and need the excuse first. After the race I can say, if only I dressed as Harry Potter I am certain I would have won.

 The second race is where my energy is. It's also on an island. The only difference is... well everything. All my best to all my friends and training pals racing. I hope you have a day that exceeds your wildest dreams.


beth said...

thank you! this is the perfect "last thing to read" before i wake up tomorrow. its always good to step back for a second, and have a little perspective. i'm pretty sure thoughts of you AND your sweet patient will help me through the miles tomorrow.
aloha! and have a great race yourself.

Marit C-L said...

Hey Jen - I was going to comment on your new Serotta (spelling?) - but (as usual with your blog), started reading your other excellent posts and couldn't stop. This one had me breathless -

It is SO true. DO NOT wait to do the things you've always wanted to do... NEVER EVER - tell people you love them, appreciate the little things, and live life to the fullest - because you never know when things will change. My heart goes out to this couple... What a powerful post you've written - thank you so much for sharing...

PS - the new bike is a beauty... :)