Get Over It!
A year ago I was a triathlon virgin. As a fan of 40+ mile bike rides, a sprint tri with a 9 mile bike didn't seem like much. I was sure that Oceanside 70.3 was my goal. At the beginner triathlon in Glorietta Bay I got so nervous swimming I hyperventilated. I thought I could never do a 1.2 mile swim in the ocean (with flailing limbs everywhere). Somehow I finished the 400 m swim in the glassy bay and went charging. I was clinging to the notion maybe I could still do a half ironman. As the year went on I became a stronger swimmer and no longer was nervous about the event. I even picked a pretty aggressive time goal. It was written on my mirror and I looked at it every morning. By September I felt ready, and did the Superfrog Triathlon as a test. By March things would be great. A couple of months before the race things started to unravel. I fell forging a river and nailed my knee cap on a rock. This sidelined my running for a while and even curtailed some riding. I trained heavily on the bike, in the pool and did a lot of rehab. I thought I'd be alright. A week before the event I came down with a nasty case of strep throat. Uh-oh. I layed on the couch icing my throat with popcicles and watching pathetic daytime television (I never watch tv) I became depressed. Not only was I not going to make my time goals but I didn't even know if I could race. Ouch....all the time spent training, the money I spent on the entry fee. What a waste. Wah poor me, Desperate Housewifes played in the background. Then I thought twice. Get over being sick and get over yourself. Even if I had to withdraw from the event, my time and efforts were not wasted. It was still money and time well spent. I thought about the bonds I formed with my training partners and how much fun I had. Who am I kidding? I'm proud of my early morning swims, my 100 miles rides, and my runs at Penasquitos. I own those training sessions while acknowledging they were gifts from God. I thought of my Unlce who was undergoing chemo and my Dad dealing with Parkison's. Get over yourself, get better then get off the couch. I'm glad I spent my days off riding Del Dios instead of trekking the mall. If I felt ok, I was going to do the race at a cruising pace and have fun. It was really hard letting go of the expectations I had for the day. No pushing, just cruise became my plan. I was nervous standing in my wetsuit before the swim. I had no idea what my body was going to do that day. I heard Tim's mom Cindy cheering for me and decided it was time to get a little excited. I enjoyed riding through Camp Pendleton. I loved the run in Oceanside supported by so many familiar faces. Many high fives were shared on the run course. I saw Jess, smiling and going really fast. I saw Raja, looking determined, not willing to give in to the 3 lbs of titanium in her back (even a hoarse falling on her can't stop her). I saw Tim's dad Bruce running to a 4th place finish (that's fast). Stacey S. was working the TCSD aid station. She came out and ran with me for a bit. She said I looked good and I said I felt great. I was suprised at how good I felt.I knew how bad I would feel if I was on the sidelines watching that day. When I crossed the finish I saw Tim still in his scrubs. He said good thing I didn't finish any sooner because he wouldn't have been there on time. We laughed, I pulled it off. I really felt blessed. Blessed I was able to race. Blessed I swallowed my pride. Physically my day was not a personal record (PR) but mentally I'd call it a personal best. Next year.....I'll meet that goal time.
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